my body, my say — how to handle unwelcome hugs 💋🙅‍♀️

a story about consent, body autonomy and choosing how we connect

tully doesn’t like surprise hugs — and neither do her cousins. when family expectations meet personal boundaries, it’s time to bring out the connection cards. in this playful, affirming episode co-created in therapy, tully and her grown-ups explore how to choose connection that feels safe, respectful, and truly shared.

🎧 listen to the episode

tully doesn’t like surprise hugs — and neither do her cousins. when family expectations meet personal boundaries, it’s time to bring out the connection cards. in this playful, affirming episode co-created in therapy, tully and her grown-ups explore how to choose connection that feels safe, respectful, and truly shared.

📝 about this episode

in this story, we meet tully — a bright, boundary-aware kid who loves her sparkly gold backpack, but doesn’t always love surprise hugs. when she arrives at grandma’s birthday brunch, she finds herself facing a familiar situation: well-meaning grown-ups forgetting to ask.

co-created in therapy with a particular brave spark, this episode explores what it means to choose your own kind of connection. through tully’s handmade connection cards, the story gently models consent, communication, and the power of pause. it celebrates kids as whole people with preferences, voices, and ways of saying hello (or goodbye) that feel right for them.

💭 reflection questions

– how does your body tell you when it’s not ready for a hug?
– what kind of connection do you like best?
– if you made your own connection cards, what would be on them?
– how can grown-ups tell when someone might not want a hug?
– what helps you feel brave when saying "no thank you"?

💛 note for grown-ups

this story supports body autonomy and models how we can create felt-safety for children — felt-safety is the sense of being safe in our own bodies, not just appearing safe to others.

many children, especially neurodivergent kids, feel overwhelmed when affection is unexpected or uninvited. this story gently shows that hugs and kisses should never be assumed — even from loving family members — and that children can choose how they connect, in ways that feel good to them.

the connection cards offer a playful, visual way to practise saying yes, no, or something in between — while helping others learn to pause, ask, and listen. you might like to model responsive and respectful language with others too.

shifting social norms happens little by little — in small, everyday moments. by digging deep into brave, you and your child are part of something big. you’re helping create a world where consent, safety, and connection are chosen, not assumed.

💡 therapy tips to try

– create your own connection cards at home using drawings or stickers — include options like wave, sparkle hand, air kiss, quiet nod, fist bump
– practise saying "no thank you" and "not right now" in a mirror, role-play, or with toys to help build confidence
– invite family members to join the game: "can you guess which card I’m using today?"
– talk about how different people like different kinds of connection — and how we can ask first to find out what feels good

✨ these therapy tips were created with the particular brave spark who helped shape this story in mind. your child’s needs may be different, so it’s always a good idea to check in with their therapy team. the good news? these ideas can do no harm — and they might even spark some fun, connection, or curiosity along the way 🌟

🎧 credits

written by: trust children and the kids we support (and a sprinkle of ai magic)
voice: brave sparks team
sound mixing: brave sparks team
music: serene acoustic guitar melodies by lolamoore — https://freesound.org/s/768424 — attribution 4.0

🎙️ voice cast (generated using elevenlabs):
– tully — kawaii aerisita
– dad — mark
– grandma — seer morganna
– cousin 1 — lucie
– cousin 2 — austin boy

🎧 sound effects:
🔔 tibetan bowl_left hit.wav by dersinnsspace — https://freesound.org/s/417117 — creative commons 0
🎶 sad little piano tune by robhog — https://freesound.org/s/685321/ — attribution 4.0
🔊 family ambience by f-r-a-g-i-l-e — https://freesound.org/s/496749 — attribution 4.0
🔔 doorbell shortened by jwheeler91 — https://freesound.org/s/442280 — creative commons 0
🌀 record scratch.wav by luffy — https://freesound.org/s/3536 — attribution 4.0
💓 heart beat.wav by chamonesteyn — https://freesound.org/s/542218 — attribution 4.0
🔔 richcraft - multiple chime by richcraftstudios — https://freesound.org/s/454608 — attribution 4.0
🧵 zipper opens — generated using elevenlabs sound effects — https://www.elevenlabs.io
🃏 cards flicking — generated using elevenlabs sound effects — https://www.elevenlabs.io
😂 kids laughing — generated using elevenlabs sound effects — https://www.elevenlabs.io
🍽️ clinking dishes — elevenlabs sfx id: 11l-clinking_dishes_clea-1747274473354 — https://www.elevenlabs.io
🎉 joyful upbeat energy by nancy_sinclair — https://freesound.org/s/759644 — creative commons 0
🌬️ whoosh.soft.wav by junggle — https://freesound.org/s/73263 — attribution 4.0
💋 double_kiss_real.aif by stereostereo — https://freesound.org/s/117355 — attribution 4.0

🌟 explore more brave sparks

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→ related episode: my body, my say — the toilet truce 🚽✋